Anyone with a family of 4+ knows the joys and challenges of a big family. Enjoy!
1. Everyone ever will ask your mom/dad “Are they all yours??”
What kind of answer are they expecting? “No we stole half of them.” or “Hey, who’s that little one? You’re not mine! Get out of here!”
2. Or my personal favorite, “You must be Catholic!”
Why don’t you make it more uncomfortable and just tell us your opinion on birth control, Peg the Costco Check-Out Lady?
3. “You must be Mormon!”
4. “You must be …..”
Let’s play a game called “Don’t Make Assumptions About Our Life”.
5. Then there’s the inevitable “How do you afford so many mouths?”
Well, really it’s not the mouths that are the problem. It’s the haircuts for the heads, the braces for the teeth, the glasses for the eyes, the shoes for the feet, the school for the brain. Kids are really a full-body commitment. Stop being a snoop about our finances, Wanda from Target.
6. You will never be called the right name. You will always be four of your siblings’ names first and then your own.
My official name MollyEmmaMindiJoshMaggie.
7. Full-family chore day
“Please put me on dusting. Please put me on dusting.”
8. You know deep down that your parents only had you all for the free labor
9. YOU’RE THE ONE KID WHO DID THE LAUNDRY. SO. MUCH. LAUNDRY.
I will never match socks again in my life. It is my kryptonite. I hide socks before I match them.
10. Going to school and everyone says “So you’re ___’s little sister?”
Yes, the fact that I share similar DNA with my older sibling is the only defining characteristic about me.
11. Or “You’re ____’s big sister?”
12. Whenever your sibling gets to go run fun errands on chore day and abandons you
13. Your house/car is always fuller than one thinks
14. Hand-me downs and “slightly used” 4 life
15. You weren’t allowed do anything but by the fourth kid, your parents just don’t care anymore.
Do they even know what curfew is???
16. Dinner is more like who can grab food fastest
How many times has my mom said “fend for yourselves”?
17. THE LUCKY CHARMS ARE ALWAYS GONE BY THE NEXT DAY
It doesn’t matter what time you wake up to get some for breakfast. It’s gone.
18. Waiters/Waitresses, we’re automatically sorry about how much food you’ll be in charge of.
19. Sibling alliances
20. Sibling rivalries
21. You never get bored…you just go find someone else to annoy
22. Grocery shopping is a sport
And Costco is your stadium.
23. Your mom will always be disappointed that you all can’t perfectly harmonize and pull off matching outfits
Big families are hilarious, chaotic, and wonderful. Even though I may not choose to have a big family in the future, it was certainly a blessing to be raised in one.